Doctors & Health✳
Pretty sure I have mites!
Pretty sure I have mites! Cell: "I'm itching all the time and I can't stop. Pretty sure I have mites!" Doctor: "You are a cell. Individual bodily c…
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Religion & Clergy✳
Once there was a little boy in church.
Once there was a little boy in church. He had to go to the bathroom so he told his mother, "Mommy, I have to piss." The mother said, "Son don't say …
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A Funny Story
Q: How many Romulans does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 151, one to screw the light-bulb in, and 150 to self-destruct the ship out of disgrace…
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God said to Adam "I'm going to make you a woman"
God said to Adam "I'm going to make you a woman" God: "She's going to clean for you, cook anything you want whenever you want it, always look beauti…
Read the joke ↗Law & Courtroom✳
There was a knock at my door.
There was a knock at my door. I said, "Who is it?" and they told me that it was the police. I asked them what they wanted and they said that they wa…
Read the joke ↗History & Politics✳
4 million of these people enter our country every year. They are uneducated, unskilled, and contribute nothing. They are a burden to honest, hardworking Americans and our governmen
4 million of these people enter our country every year. They are uneducated, unskilled, and contribute nothing. They are a burden to honest, hardwork…
Read the joke ↗General Jokes✳
I lost my watch at a party once...
I lost my watch at a party once... An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was sexually harassing some woman at that party. Infuriated,…
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A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and.....
A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and..... A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber …
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A Funny Story
At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?" The little boy nodde…
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Sick old man
Sick old man An elderly man, woke one morning and was not feeling too well. He got himself up and walked over to his daughters house. He was hard of…
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So I was jogging around the track at the gym and this really hot Latina chick passed me. I gave her a friendly wave and said "hola."
So I was jogging around the track at the gym and this really hot Latina chick passed me. I gave her a friendly wave and said "hola." However, she ke…
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There were two guys in a lunatic asylum (LONG).
There were two guys in a lunatic asylum (LONG). This joke is in honor of the Batman comic The Killing Joke getting a movie release (no matter how lu…
Read the joke ↗Animals & Nature✳
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are driving through a desert.
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are driving through a desert. An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are driving through a desert when …
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A Funny Story
A 75 year old man went to his doctor's office to get sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and nbring me back a sa…
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How do you know?
How do you know? An air traffic control tower suddenly lost communication with a small twin engine aircraft. A moment later the tower landline rang …
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Terrorist Alert
Terrorist Alert At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight whil…
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A Chinaman in Paris picks up a girl and takes her to his hotel room.
A Chinaman in Paris picks up a girl and takes her to his hotel room. He opens the bedroom window and takes a deep breath. Then, they get into bed to…
Read the joke ↗Tech Jokes✳
Amazon Drones
Amazon Drones I read an article about drones recently. A software development firm was testing drones in the Amazon basin and developing mapping sof…
Read the joke ↗Animals & Nature✳
As a reward for winning a race, a young stallion was put in a compound with a beautiful female zebra.
As a reward for winning a race, a young stallion was put in a compound with a beautiful female zebra. As the next day dawned, the keeper ran to see …
Read the joke ↗Family & Marriage✳
A Russian man is driving with his wife and small child.
A Russian man is driving with his wife and small child. A militia man pulls them over and makes the man take a breathalyzer test. "See," the militia…
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A blind man takes a stool sample to the hospital
A blind man takes a stool sample to the hospital Everyone is looking at him with disgust as he asks for the optical department. "Sir the laborator…
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A Genius, an Old Farmer, and a Boy Scout are on a plane...
A Genius, an Old Farmer, and a Boy Scout are on a plane... ...The pilot enters the cabin and says, "I'm terribly sorry. I've done everything I can, …
Read the joke ↗Food & Drink✳
A Funny Story
Q: How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg. A: Five: O…
Read the joke ↗Food & Drink✳
A guy walks into a bar
A guy walks into a bar And sees 3 pieces of meat hanging from the ceiling. The guy asks, “What’s this about?” The bartender replies, “Well, if you c…
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