Money & Shopping✳
A person died.
A person died. He willed all his earthly possessions to be divided among an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotchman. But the will was conditional; ea…
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22 jokes · RSS ↗Money & Shopping
Money & Shopping✳
AN actor played a season at Richmond theatre for the
AN actor played a season at Richmond theatre for the privilege only of having a benefit. When his night came, and having to sustain a principal part …
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WHEN George the Fourth went to Ireland, one of the
WHEN George the Fourth went to Ireland, one of the "pisintry" said to the toll-keeper as the king passed through, "Och, now! an' his majesty never pa…
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SIR ROBERT WALPOLE having misquoted a passage in Horace, Mr.
SIR ROBERT WALPOLE having misquoted a passage in Horace, Mr. Pulteney said the honorable gentleman's Latin was as bad as his politics. Sir Robert adh…
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A COMPANY of performers announced in their bills the opening
A COMPANY of performers announced in their bills the opening of a theatre at Montrose, with the Farce of _The Devil to Pay_, to be followed with the …
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Jesus said to man: You have a wonderful personality.
Jesus said to man: You have a wonderful personality. Develop it. Be yourself. Don't imagine that your perfection lies in accumulating or possessing e…
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Mr.
"Mr. Smith, I represent the Stygian Life Insurance Company. I know you don't want to talk to me or listen to me; I know you have all the insurance yo…
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Mr.
Mr. Morgan, the one, was a reluctant aspirant for the honor, but he payed his respects to the people by calling meetings at various points and addres…
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LADY HARDWICKE, the lady of the Chancellor, loved money as
LADY HARDWICKE, the lady of the Chancellor, loved money as well as he did, and what _he_ got _she_ saved. The purse in which the Great Seal is carrie…
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A PERSON wishing to test whether a daft individual, about
A PERSON wishing to test whether a daft individual, about whom a variety of opinions were entertained,--some people thinking him not so foolish as he…
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A RIGHT reverend prelate, himself a man of extreme good-nature
A RIGHT reverend prelate, himself a man of extreme good-nature, was frequently much vexed in the spirit by the proud, froward, perverse, and untracta…
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SANDLOTTER, n.
SANDLOTTER, n. A vertebrate mammal holding the political views of Denis Kearney, a notorious demagogue of San Francisco, whose audiences gathered in …
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A BARONET scientifically skilled in pugilism, enjoyed no pleasure so
A BARONET scientifically skilled in pugilism, enjoyed no pleasure so much as giving gratuitous instructions in his favorite art. A peer paying him a …
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INK, n.
INK, n. A villainous compound of tannogallate of iron, gum-arabic and water, chiefly used to facilitate the infection of idiocy and promote intellect…
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IN one of Sir Robert Walpole's letters, he gives a
IN one of Sir Robert Walpole's letters, he gives a very instructive picture of a skilful minister and a condescending Parliament. "My dear friend," w…
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I bought some shoes from a drug dealer
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
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IN the museum at Abbotsford there is a small Roman
IN the museum at Abbotsford there is a small Roman _patera_, or goblet, in showing which Sir Walter Scott tells the following story: "I purchased thi…
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Thar was a very serious accident happened to us," said
"Thar was a very serious accident happened to us," said Mr. Mudge, "as we wos crossin' the plains. 'Twas on the bank of the Peacus river. Thar was a …
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A VERY laughable incident occurred in the House of Commons.
A VERY laughable incident occurred in the House of Commons. An Irish member, whose name I will not mention, having risen, he was assailed by loud cri…
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What does a pirate pay for his corn?
What does a pirate pay for his corn? A buccaneer!
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The Blanket
We bought a blanket together. It’s the first thing in our relationship we both cover.
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The Chair
I bought a chair from a magician. It disappeared when I sat down.
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