Animals & Nature✳
In a mood for companionship with none at hand, a
In a mood for companionship with none at hand, a New Yorker was making her way through a quiet down town cross street to an East Side subway. As she …
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48 jokes · RSS ↗Animals & Nature
Animals & Nature✳
EMBALM, v.i.
EMBALM, v.i. To cheat vegetation by locking up the gases upon which it feeds. By embalming their dead and thereby deranging the natural balance betwe…
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Sympathy with pain there will, of course, always be.
Sympathy with pain there will, of course, always be. It is one of the first instincts of man. The animals which are individual, the higher animals, t…
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AT Plymouth there is, or was, a small green opposite
AT Plymouth there is, or was, a small green opposite the Government House, over which no one was permitted to pass. Not a creature was allowed to app…
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I hope that all twenty-five of you will have a
"I hope that all twenty-five of you will have a pleasant trip." The soup appeared, and he continued: "I sincerely hope that this little assembly of t…
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The widow was deep in suds over the family wash
The widow was deep in suds over the family wash, when she saw her pastor coming up the path to the door. She gave directions to her young son to answ…
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MR.
MR. SLOCUM was not educated in a university, and his life has been in by-paths, and out-of-the-way places. His mind is characterized by the literalne…
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David thought the farmer a fool, and rode on, admiring
David thought the farmer a fool, and rode on, admiring the blue sky uncheckered by a single cloud. He had not proceeded more than half the distance t…
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A Texas lad, lacking a team of horses or oxen
A Texas lad, lacking a team of horses or oxen or mules for his ploughing, engaged his sister to direct the plough, while he yoked himself to a steer …
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DURING the representation of "Macbeth," an eminent special pleader graced
DURING the representation of "Macbeth," an eminent special pleader graced the boxes of Drury Lane Theatre, to see it performed. When the hero questio…
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I knew, all the time, he was lying, and so
"I knew, all the time, he was lying, and so I watched him and his old roan tu; and for three nights regular, old roan came to my stable about bed-tim…
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A SCOTCH Minister, after a hard day's labor, and while
A SCOTCH Minister, after a hard day's labor, and while at a "denner tea," as he called it, kept incessantly praising the "haam," and stating that "Mr…
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MRS.
MRS. MONTGOMERY was the only--the motherless--daughter of the stern General Campbell, who early installed her into the duties of housekeeper, and it …
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FREEMASONS, n.
FREEMASONS, n. An order with secret rites, grotesque ceremonies and fantastic costumes, which, originating in the reign of Charles II, among working …
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RETURNING from hunting one day, George III.
RETURNING from hunting one day, George III. entered affably into conversation with his wine-merchant, Mr. Carbonel, and rode with him side by side a …
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FRANKALMOIGNE, n.
FRANKALMOIGNE, n. The tenure by which a religious corporation holds lands on condition of praying for the soul of the donor. In mediaeval times many …
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It is doubtless true that it would require a surgical
It is doubtless true that it would require a surgical operation to get a joke into some particular Scotchman's head. But we have some persons of the …
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SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE was so bad a horseman, that when
SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE was so bad a horseman, that when mounted he generally attracted unfavorable notice. On a certain occasion he was riding along…
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THEOSOPHY, n.
THEOSOPHY, n. An ancient faith having all the certitude of religion and all the mystery of science. The modern Theosophist holds, with the Buddhists,…
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A STUPID fellow employed in blowing a cathedral organ, said
A STUPID fellow employed in blowing a cathedral organ, said after the performance of a fine anthem, "I think we performed very well to-day."--"_We_ p…
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The bread-tree grows abundantly.
"The bread-tree grows abundantly. Its branches are well known to Europe and America under the familiar name of _maccaroni_. The smaller twigs are cal…
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LETTUCE, n.
LETTUCE, n. An herb of the genus _Lactuca_, "Wherewith," says that pious gastronome, Hengist Pelly, "God has been pleased to reward the good and puni…
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A CLERGYMAN who is in the habit of preaching in
A CLERGYMAN who is in the habit of preaching in different parts of the country, was not long since at an inn, where he observed a horse jockey trying…
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HATTON, who was a considerable favorite at the Haymarket Theatre
HATTON, who was a considerable favorite at the Haymarket Theatre, and particularly in the part of _Jack Junk_, was one night at Gosport, performing t…
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