A man and his friend are talking while on the loo...

A man and his friend are talking while on the loo...

...when the man starts yelling and screaming in pain. His friend is shocked and doesn't know what to do, so he barges in, and is horrified by the sight in front of him. Big, rectangular faeces litter the floor.
The friend turns to the man and says "Are you alright?! I'd be worried if I was you."
To which the man replies "I am worried! I'm shitting bricks!"