A woman is fed up with her love life...

A woman is fed up with her love life...

...so she puts an ad in the newspaper.

'What is wrong with men? I have had no luck. My first boyfriend was abusive and I had to leave him out of fear. My second relationship was going great until one day he inexplicably left. My last guy was kind and wanted to be with me forever, but he couldn't satisfy me sexually so I left him. Are there no good ones left?'

A few days later there is someone at her door.

"I think I am the perfect man for you," says a voice. She looks down and sees a limbless man laying on her doormat. "I have no arms so I cannot hit you," he continues, "and I have no legs so I cannot run away."

"But how can you possibly satisfy me sexually?" she asks.

"How the fuck do you think I rang the doorbell?" he replies.